Could someone please tell me why the second someone finds out you're pregnant, they're the top authority on your life? I get that you've been there before, that you "Know exactly how I'm feeling," but would you just shut up unless I ask you for your input? I do have examples of this:
Example number one: Fetal Demise
Well Meaning Woman (WMW): How far along are you now?
Me: 11 weeks
WMW: Oh. That's about how far I was when I had a miscarriage.
WHAT?! Why would you tell a hormonal woman in her first trimester about your miscarriage? Yes, it happens. Yes, if I have a miscarriage, I would love to know that you've been there, but right now, I don't need the solid assurance that every woman miscarries in her first trimester! Seriously!
Example number two: Pregnancy Safety
Me: I'm going to dye my hair.
WMW: You need to make sure you talk to your doctor before you do that. Hair dye is bad for you in pregnancy, it can hurt the baby.
Guess what? It's really not. And there's NO evidence to suggest that it can affect the baby. None whatsoever.
Example number three: Morning Sickness
WMW: How are you feeling?
Me: I'm okay.
WMW: Still sick?
Me: Yeah.
WMW: Shouldn't you be about over that by now?
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! Guess what? I'm not. Isn't that enough? It's not like I can say, "Ok, fetus, it's been a few weeks now, it's time to be over this!" Apparently my body will stop being sick if and when it's ready to stop being sick. Don't tell me that I should be over it by now. Really. It won't go well.
Example number four: Still Morning Sickness
WMW: I know EXACTLY how you feel. I was sick until 17 weeks. I even threw up once. It was horrible.
This I didn't even gratify with a response. You threw up ONCE?! I would have given up my right arm to only throw up once! I throw up once a day...at least. Usually twice, and there were days that the number reached 4, 5, even 6 times. So no. You don't know exactly how I feel. I know that you were sick for all those weeks, and I would never want to make you feel like your sickness wasn't as bad as mine, because I'm sure it was horrible. But...don't you dare try to console me by telling me you threw up once during the first trimester. That's not the same as throwing up multiple times a day, really, it's not.
I say this, because as we speak, my sickness seems to be decreasing, at least a little bit. My multiple times a day is down to about 1 a day, and that's a lot more doable for me...but the constant nausea still hasn't lifted. I feel better when you tell me that you were sick too, and that you sympathize with my pain. It's okay to leave it at that. Really.
In other news, I'm looking for a new doctor who accepts medicaid. Anyone have recommendations?
